Thursday, September 29, 2005

Six things you never want to hear at the tattoo parlor

" 'Eagle?' I thought you said 'beagle.' "

"Boy, I hate it when I get hiccups."

"Hey, buddy, we ran out of red, so I used pink."

"Two O's in 'Bob,' right?"

"I bet you can't tell I've never done this before."

"Anything else you want to say? You've got all kinds of room back here."

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Quote of the Day #151

You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing.

-- Michael Pritchard

Monday, September 26, 2005

Overheard in New York...

Crackhead lady #1: I need to stop, because now I'm looking down the barrel of a monkey.
Crackhead lady #2: I know what you mean. If I wasn't using all this energy chasing a high, I could use the energy productively, like jumping on a trampoline.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Picture of the Day #52

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Quote of the Day #150

Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There's one marked 'Brightness,' but it doesn't work.

-- Gallagher

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Friday, September 23, 2005

Quote of the Day #149

Do not condemn the judgement of another because it differs from your own. You may both be wrong.

-- Dandemis

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Crime and Punishment

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Word of the Day #12

(KAR-ik-tuh-nim) noun

A name of a fictional character that suggests the personality traits of that character.

[From English character, from Greek charakter (marking or engraving tool) + -onym (name).]

The examples from one of my favourite book series - The Asterix Books. Almost all the character names in the books are charactonyms:

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Word of the Day #11

(AN-uh-nim) noun

A name formed by reversing letters of another name, often used as a pseudonym.

[From Greek ana- (back) + -onym (name).]


Monday, September 19, 2005

Quote of the Day #148

True friendship is like sound health, the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.

-- Charles Caleb Colton

Thursday, September 15, 2005

What Yahoo Maps doesnt tell you...

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Hymn of the Big Wheel

by Massive Attack

The big wheel keeps on turning
On a simple line day by day
The earth spins on its axis
One man struggle while another relaxes

There's a hole in my soul like a cavity
Seems like the world is out to gather just by gravity
The wheel keeps turning the sky's rearranging
Look my son the weather is changing

I'd like to feel that you could be free
Look up at the blue skies beneath a new tree
Sometime again
You'll turn green and the sea turns red
My son I said the power of axis over my head

The big wheel keeps on turning
On a simple line day by day
The earth spins on its axis
One man struggle while another relaxes

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We sang about the sun and danced among the trees
And we listened to the whisper of the city on the breeze
Will you cry in the most in a lead-free zone
Down within the shadows where the factories drone
On the surface of the wheel they build another town
And so the green come tumbling down
Yes close your eyes and hold me tight
And i'll show you sunset sometime again

The big wheel keeps on turning
On a simple line day by day
The earth spins on its axis
One man struggle while another relaxes

As a child's silent prayer my hope hides in disguise
While satellites and cameras watch from the skies
An acid drop of rain recycled from the sea
It washed away my shadow burnt a hole in me
And all the king's men cannot put it back again
But the ghetto sun will nurture life
And mend my soul sometime again

The big wheel keeps on turning
On a simple line day by day
The earth spins on its axis
One man struggle while another relaxes

Hit me with another quote...

To be amused by what you read - that is the great spring of happy quotations.

-- C E Montague

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Quote of the Day #147

Information can tell us everything. It has all the answers. But they are answers to questions we have not asked, and which doubtless don't even arise.

Jean Baudrillard
--Cool Memories

Random Sentence of the Day

A wedge eats the greedily orbiting cargo bay, but a buzzard heading towards a traffic light plans an escape from the paternal burglar reactor.

Online Overload

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Quote of the Day #146

We were brought up watching opening batsmen score nine before lunch. If Geoffrey Boycott flashed at a ball outside off stump in the first over of a Test match, questions were asked in Parliament. If he flashed at two, the ravens abandoned the Tower of London.

-- Brian Viner writes about the frenetic pace of the current Ashes series and wonders what happened to Test cricket as he knew it

Quote of the Day #145

I can accept failure, but I can't accept not trying.

-- Michael Jordan

Thursday, September 08, 2005

How Men and Women Think Differently

Jim's doctor tells him he has only one day to live. When Jim goes home to share the bad news with his wife, she asks what he wants to do with the little bit of time he has left.

"All I want," Jim tells his beloved wife, "is to spend my last few hours reliving our honeymoon." Which is exactly what they did.

But after four hours of blissful romance, she announces that she's tired and wants to go to sleep.

"Oh, come on," Jim whispers in her ear.

"Look," his wife snaps, "I've got to get up in the morning. You don't."

Quote of the Day #144

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history -- with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.

-- Mitch Ratcliffe

Mixing handguns and tequila will let you make mistakes even faster.

Sunday, September 04, 2005

Quote of the Day #143

Anything not worth doing is worth not doing well. Think about it.

-- Elias Schwartz
I thought about it, and there seems to be a lot of wisdom in this world about doing nothing at all.

Friday, September 02, 2005

Anyone Feel Evil Today?

It is better to be feared than loved, more prudent to be cruel than compassionate.

-- Niccolo Machiavelli

Thursday, September 01, 2005

Pretentious Nursery Rhyme of the Day #2

I'm a little teapot

Short and stout
Here is my handle
Here is my spout.
When I get all steamed up
Hear me shout:
Tip me up and pour me out!
I am a vessel specifically designed

For the calefaction of tea leaves and water combined.
I am of diminutive dimension:
A corpulent invention.
Observe the place where your hand is supposed to go.
Observe the outlet where the drink is supposed to flow.
When my temperature is high,
Ebullition will make me cry:
You must use my leverage
To release the beverage.

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